Beautiful and Broken

Shattered by Elizabeth Lee

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Song for this Read: Joey by Sugarland


I started Shattered and by page two my heart was already wrenching for Alyssa Boyd. A newly graduated high school senior, Alyssa carries a lot of guilt and pain on her shoulders. It has been nine months since her best friend Garret died and her other, Jesse, left her without so much as a goodbye. Garret and Jesse had taken a sad little Alyssa Boyd under their wing in 8th grade and ever since they have done everything to keep her smiling. Jesse has been in love with Alyssa since he first laid eyes on her but has never made his move from best friend to boyfriend. Nine months after he left in the wake of his best friend’s untimely death, Jesse is back in town. And this time he isn’t chickening out.
When Alyssa Boyd is first presented she is a mess of raw emotions and hurt and anger. Her voice is desperate and delicate and my heart broke for her. As Jesse entered the story and told his side more of the pieces fit together and as they both retold tales of their escapades with Garret I found myself totally falling for these two amazing boys who would do anything to see Alyssa smile. I could help but see them as two big brothers to Alyssa, always looking out for her. The whole first half of this book, two words kept coming to mind to describe it: Beautiful and Broken. But somewhere in the middle there the beauty was lost. The story just became broken and frustrating. I would read one chapter full of Alyssa doing stupid things and get to the next chapter just to tell me everything that just happened in the last chapter from his side. It was going nowhere. So when Things finally did come around I noticed something else was lost. No long was the story about them being broken either, it seemed that I was just to forget about the fact that all of a week ago Alyssa could walk into the gym because of memories of Garret and now all the sudden Jesse is here and she is completely fine, she is over it. Well that was disappointing, because what I was really looking forward to most was the two of them working through moving past their pain of losing Garret together. The storyline seemed to turn from this brooding, grief filled plot full of raw emotions to this fluff piece where everyone is just looking for trouble where it doesn’t need to be. It was really disappointing.
I’m giving this book four stars (out of five) because the beginning really was spectacular, it had me want to cry and smile all at the same time. The second half had potential, I just feel that the essence of the book was lost and that is saddening to me. But overall it was a great read.




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The Devils Playground

Every Which Way by Calia Read

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Songs for this Read: Just for Tonight by The Spacepimps

Goodreads Summary:
Severine Blake has seen far too many friends taken down in the crossfires of dating. She devises a precise course of action to protect her heart. The plan is working very well...until she meets Thayer and Macsen.
When the Sloan brothers come into her life, nothing is the same.

Thayer is self-possessed, arrogant and used to getting what he wants. Being near him leaves Severine unsteady and shaken. He makes her question everything.
Macsen contradicts his brother in every way. His calm personality captivates her. Severine is drawn to him instantly.
But Severine quickly discovers that when you want something, that want can turn wicked. Giving in is not always easy, especially when your heart refuses to give up the fight.

What little illusion of love Severine has is soon destroyed. Every option is broken, and the protection she has built around her heart instantly crumbles.

There's just no right way with the Sloan brothers.
(I don't think this summary gives you any idea what it about to go down. You really just need to read it for yourself. Do not judge this by the summary)

*Quick note: I have now written this review three different times. The first time, I went to save and it disappeared into cyberspace. The next I simply hit a few too many buttons on my keyboard while typing and next thing I know the page reloaded and my review was no longer in existence. But hey, third times a charm right??
This book was so much more than I was expecting. It was funny, and frustrating and raw. At times it had me so angry I wanted to slap the characters and then I would turn the page and just want to hug them. More often than not I was perplexed. Severine is one of the single most confusing protagonists I have ever read. Her thoughts are tangents of contradictions; she has no Idea what she wants and she is so prideful more than once it came close to suffocating. But for all her fault she was someone I wanted to read about. What really kept me apart from this story is that I don’t relate to Severine at all. Her motive and reasonings were never quite clear to me, her thoughts were murky and twisted in my mind and her actions were never the logical ones. She was always either thinking too much or acting entirely on impulse; she was a mystery even to herself. Much of what Severine did I didn’t understand, she was so unlike any leading female character I had ever read I didn’t really know what to make of her. But finally about 150 pages in a decided I did like her. She still frustrated me and I struggled to follow her trains of thought but she intrigued me; her and the Sloan brothers both.
These characters came out completely different on the other side of 600 pages than when I cracked the spine. (Ok, let’s be honest, I read this on my ereader. But “cracked the spine” has a nice ring to it, right?) I would have to go back and reread it, which I more than likely will, but I can’t help but feel that many of these characters I just finished reading about are not the same ones who were presented to me on page one. I can’t decide if I just chock this up to character development which some of it definitely is, or if at some point the author kinda took control and bent these characters so they would fit. Either way it worked out great, I’m just curious.
Only one last thing to address here, I think. That ending, it would appear Read is spoiling me with a sequel. How I will ever prepare myself for a round two after all that she just put me through, I have no idea. But who can say no to another 600 pages of Thayer Sloan?? (Didn’t think so :) ) I see frustration and pain in my future thanks to these Sloan boys, but if Read is willing to dish it out, well then that is a challenge I’m willing to accept.




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M.A.D.N.E.S.S.

This would be my follow up to the Evolution of Mara Dyer. I could talk about this book for days. There may be some light *spoilers* if you are very sensitive to that, but nothing huge.
I don't know exactly how I want to set up this post so I'm just winging it. First up just some snippets and pieces that I love way too much not to mention. Mainly I want to point a spotlight on the magnificent, amazing, wonderful brother that is Daniel Dyer. While Noah Shaw is Mr Panty Dropping Grin, Daniel Dyer is the one that would have me as putty in his hands. He is the sweetest person and his love for Mara just melts me. I hate "ruining" things for people but I love this quote of Daniels, so if you don't want to read it don't look at the quote below. But i swear its just the sweetest thing I've ever read.

"I wish she knew that she's really Mom's favorite". . . "I wish Mara knew that I never minded, because she's my favorite too."

I start tearing up every time I read this chapter. So three cheers and some tears for Daniel, my favorite.

Now moving on to my findings and theories. The biggest thing in this sequel is the emphasis Michelle puts on names."There is power in a name," the phrase is repeated throughout the book. So I took the hint and searched the meaning of just about all the names and I must say it paid off. Here is a list of some of the names I found:

• Mara- Demon, Hebrew for bitter
• Amitra (Mara's middle name)- Sanskrit for destroyer of the enemy
• Sarin (Indie Dyer's maiden name)- all i could find on this one is it may be Hindi for "helpful" and that is it also the name of a lethal nerve gas. 
• Noah- Rest, Comfort
• Elliot (Noah's middle name) - "My God is the Lord"
• Simon (Noah's other middle name) - Hebrew for "He has heard" 
• Jamal (Jamie's full name)- Arabic for handsome or beauty 
• Stella- Star
• Benicia (Stella's last name)- Blessed 
• Jude-Praised 
• Lowe- Hebrew for Combined or old French for "young-wolf"
• Phoebe- bright, radiant, pure 
• Daniel- Hebrew for "God is my judge" 
• Joseph- Hebrew for "he will add" or "he will enlarge" 
• Rachel- a lamb; one with purity

So that's what I found, some names I suggest reading into more than others; it's interesting to read the characters with their meanings in mind. You can see how well some things fit such as Noah or Mara Amitra. Some of these meanings I looked up as I was reading this book and I was a little shocked by them when I found them, its so exciting I wrote them all right in the book.
*Mild Spoiler* I Love good symbolism in a story. One of my favorites in Evolution was when Mara and Noah found the other charm, the one just like the one Noah always wears. "They're mirror images," Mara says which set off sparks of thought in my head. Of course they are mirror images because one is Mara's and the other Noah's and while they are one and the same they are each others opposites. Mara destroys and Noah heals, Mara points anger outward, Noah in; Mara is open and thinks magically, Noah is more rigid and comfortable with science. As Michelle puts it "Healer and destroyer, noon and midnight." perfect symbolism.
And that seems to be all I have for today, although I did say I could talk about this for hours so I might be back with more. Until then enjoy my Evolution of Mara Dyer playlist below!!

Prefectly Imperfect

The Evolution of Mara Dyer by Michelle Hodkin

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Mara Dyer once believed she could run from her past.

She can’t.

She used to think her problems were all in her head.

They aren’t.

She couldn’t imagine that after everything she’s been through, the boy she loves would still be keeping secrets.

She’s wrong.

In this gripping sequel to The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer, the truth evolves and choices prove deadly. What will become of Mara Dyer next?

These books are so beyond unreal. I have never read into every word of a book the way I do these. I marked this book up like it was a notebook. Michelle has little "easter eggs" hidden all over this book which I am determined to get to the bottom to. I might do a whole post on my blog later about some of my finding. This book played heavily on my emotions. I kind of break it up into segments based on the core feeling. It goes from cautious and picks up speed to heart wrenching and takes a stop at the creepy crazy psycho station then we get to the secret part and the avoidance and then a brief moment of acceptance and peace only to be followed by terror and the most gnawing feeling of frustration that makes you want to pull your hair out, you are rewarded for you patience with this uncomfortable feeling with revelation which of course then brings you crashing down to earth at warp speed, stripping you of all prior theories, hopes, or ability to feel joy. The latter side effects could last for hours, days, or months after reading, for Michelle Hodkin has once again left us all holding our breaths.

I will most definitely have more of this review and/or a post of my findings in The Evolution of Mara Dyer, including a playlist, in the very near future on my blog, so be sure to check it out soon!





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Evolutionary

So as some may know the new Mara Dyer book is coming out in just about a wekk and I am FREAKING out!! :) If you have no idea what i am talking about please go educate yourself, google it or better yet scroll down to my review of The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer by Michelle Hodkin. These books blow my mind and I want to share their mind blowing awesomeness with the world, I also really want to win this Mara Swag contest. So for both selfish and altruistic reasons here is the teaser trailer for The Evolution of Mara Dyer on shelves next Tuesday October 23. What a beautiful date.  If video doesn't work here is the link: http://youtu.be/JnJyeDV2gcg

The Perfect Mistake

My Favorite Mistake by Chelsea M. Cameron

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Song for this Read: Sympathy by Goo Goo Dolls and You'll Ask for Me by Tyler Hilton
My Playlist:

There are also may musical references throughout the book some of them I complied below, I highly suggest listening along as the songs or artist are mentioned :)

Taylor Caldwell can't decide if she wants to kiss her new college roommate or punch him.

On the one hand, Hunter Zaccadelli is a handsome, blue-eyed bundle of charm. On the other, he's a tattooed, guitar-playing bundle of bad boy. Maybe that's why Taylor's afraid of falling in love with him, or anyone else. She doesn't want to get burned, and even though her other roommates adore him, she wants him gone before it's too late.

Hunter himself has been been burned before, but the fact that Taylor calls him out on his crap and has the sexiest laugh ever make him decide maybe love isn't a lost cause. They make a bet: if she can convince him she truly loves or hates him, he'll leave the apartment--and leave her alone. The problem is, the more time they spend together, the less she hates him, and the more she moves toward love.

But when the man who holds the key to Taylor's fear of giving up her heart resurfaces and threatens to wreck everything, she has to decide: trust Hunter with her greatest secret, or do everything in her power to win that bet and drive him away forever.

Surprisingly great read. None of the typical girl hates boy, girl falls for boy, misunderstanding/fight between girl and boy, girl and boy make up plot line. And thank goodness cause while the first 100 or so were alright I think we can all agree that story has be just about all worn out.
I loved Hunter and Taylor's story it was a perfect mix of cute cliche and originality. While the ending was completely fitting I would I have loved to have gotten to keep reading. I was kinda excited about the new prospects of Taylor and Hunter and their friends lives there at the end, I would love to continue their story. I also really wanted to see how Hope did Christmas. It was a very really book in the fact that not everything was tied up and revisited. It was just a chapter of these people's lives and not everything was finished. Personally I find ending with everything perfectly wrapped up in a pretty little bow ominous anyway.
I really did love reading this one. If not a sequel I would also love to read more about some of the supporting characters stories, specifically Darah and Mase's. This book will probably be one that I come back more than once.



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Losing Control

Losing Lila by Sarah Alderson

My rating: 5 of 5 stars



This is a sequel (to the amazing Hunting Lila, if you haven't read it, what on earth are you waiting for?!!), so I don't like to say too much but that these books are by far some of the best I've ever read. The characters are so genuine its hard to believe they are not real people walking around somewhere. Jack, Lila and Alex have some of the greatest relationships, I find myself turning green with envy at times about how strong their bond is. I seem to always be either laughing crying or stifling a scream when reading these. Suki and Nate just do me in, I love those guys and their less than innocent jokes. Everything about these books is masterfully crafted, Alderson's alternate reality welcomes you like a firm embrace had doesn't let you go till ages after the last page. I look forward to rereading these many times over.



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The Ratio of Laughter to Tears

The Statistical Probability of Love at First Sight by Jennifer E. Smith

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
Songs for this read:


Official Blurb:

 Who would have guessed that four minutes could change everything?

Today should be one of the worst days of seventeen-year-old Hadley Sullivan's life. Having missed her flight, she's stuck at JFK airport and late to her father's second wedding, which is taking place in London and involves a soon-to-be stepmother Hadley's never even met. Then she meets the perfect boy in the airport's cramped waiting area. His name is Oliver, he's British, and he's sitting in her row.

A long night on the plane passes in the blink of an eye, and Hadley and Oliver lose track of each other in the airport chaos upon arrival. Can fate intervene to bring them together once more?

Quirks of timing play out in this romantic and cinematic novel about family connections, second chances, and first loves. Set over a twenty-four-hour-period, Hadley and Oliver's story will make you believe that true love finds you when you're least expecting it.

I am such a sucker for daddy-daughter bonding stories. Call me a daddy's girl but this book just ruined me. I cried about every other chapter once Hadley got to London, like a little girl. And not just about how touching Hadley and her dads story was but also for how sad Oliver's was.
This story was just as endearing as it was humorous at times. I loved the witty repartee between Hadley and Oliver and the heartwarming family anecdotes. This book was not what I was expecting but that just added to what a pleasurable and entertaining read it was. I'm sure I'll be revisiting this one again soon.

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A Good Night Rant

Wow I haven't been on here in quite a while. I hadn't even realized how long until just now. I guess I just haven't read many books lately that i felt really deserved a review. Not say I haven't read good books, just not any that I had any real opinions to write about.
      So its ranting time. The time of the blog where I log on and rant about my current personal inflictions without giving away any real details about my personal inflictions. But in the end the internet gets a link, my blog doesn't look abandoned, and I feel a little better getting my thoughts on "paper" and off my chest. So without further ado I give you A Good Night Rant:

As you may have noted in the title of this blog, I am an introvert. A person who happens to enjoy being alone more than large social settings, they find social skills to be things they have to work at a bit more and small talk doesn't come naturally. You may have also caught on the the fact that I am a teenaged girl. I have come to accepting my slightly awkward social persona and more or less bookworm status for a couple years now. This is not to say I am social retarded or don't have friends, just that while I have friends I rarely feel the need to see them outside of school, and while I get by with my social skills just fine I do still struggle with simple small talk like conversations, as I find it to be all fluff. Like I said I have more or less embraced that this is who I am but with college right around the corner it seems to be becoming a touchy subject. 

My parents are both former extroverts. They have since transformed into quite the opposite but they still don't seem to quite understand where I am coming from. As kids both my parents were the types to always be out, as f avoiding home. My mother especially was a bit of rebel against her parents. So they see me and always have to ask why I don't chose to be out. I have tried to ask myself this but the answer always seems to be 1. where would I go? its not like my friends are real partiers, and 2. I honestly have no desire to go out. I don't want to go run into people somewhere. It's not that I don't know how to be social, I just rarely have a desire to go "out" and be around a bunch of people. 

I am probably sounding like a really loser right now, like some loner who sits in a corner. Well I'm not. I have plenty of friends and people i hang out with at school, the only difference is when I get home I chose to spend that time alone. I am fully aware of what an abnormal teen I am. Trust me I have gotten it all: "old soul", "16 going on 36", "Benjamin Buttons", all of it. But try as I have to be a little more extroverted I find I just end up exhausted and dissatisfied. With college coming up I have always viewed it as a time to not so much reinvent myself but to branch out and more or less force myself into a social word. No better time to do it right? The root of my doubt seems to lead back to my parents. Don't get me wrong I love my parents, they are honestly the absolute greatest. They love me dearly and except me for who I am but they're jokes about how "you have to social in college, remember, hon" can kinda get to me. I know I can be social and even make it in a sorority but the knocks on my personality don't help. Personally I think a forced social environment like a sorority where everyone is kinda together in something could be really good for me, I just wish I got a little support in that thinking. 

The bottom line is I didn't chose my personality, I was never given an option whether I wanted to a easy people person or who I am. I just turned out this way, and I am not going to apologize or try to be the extrovert I'm not. I believe I am the introvert I am for a reason and somehow there is a greater plan for why I don't like to party like a "typical" teenager, and that even though it is harder for me to go out and talk to people and fit into a social group that I will grow and things will work out and that there are people down the road in my life that understand and that connections and bonds and relationships will come easy with, people that i am meant to meet. Somehow I Know this will all work out in the end, and even though I still have doubts and sometimes I question why I am different, I am not ashamed. I know there is a reason, I know there is a plan.

And so ends tonight's rant. As per usual I don't really know if that was where I was intending on going with this rant but obviously it was what I needed to say, for my own sake.  Hope you enjoyed my inner most thoughts, and if not then what are you doing wasting your time, go get a life. Until my next near emotional breakdown, epiphany or book review, good night and peaceful dreams.

Can't Ignore the Boy Next Door

My Life Next Door by Huntley Fitzpatrick

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Songs for this Read: With You Around (Acoustic Version) by Yellowcard, Only Me When I'm With You by Taylor Swift, My Favourite Thing by Tonight Alive

Official Summary: The Garretts are everything the Reeds are not. Loud, numerous, messy, affectionate. And every day from her balcony perch, seventeen-year-old Samantha Reed wishes she was one of them . . . until one summer evening, Jase Garrett climbs her terrace and changes everything. As the two fall fiercely in love, Jase's family makes Samantha one of their own. Then in an instant, the bottom drops out of her world and she is suddenly faced with an impossible decision. Which perfect family will save her? Or is it time she saved herself?

      This is not the typical lighthearted summer read I thought it was going to be. The plot seems a bit tired and used at first, the whole story with the girl who keeps her "wrong side of the tracks" boyfriend a secret and lives in two worlds her friend/family and then her boyfriends world. There was a lot of tension and at times the situations can get down right frustrating, but not in bad way. While I wasn't blown away with the character development,I was impressed by the evolution of the character Tim. I loved seeing Tim grow from this stoned bum to a really lovable character.
        Overall I was pleasantly surprised by "My Life Next Door" it was not a shallow read and had some great twists in the end there. I fell in love with the Garrett family, especially the little ones. In the end there was still some closure I was lacking, there were a lot of issues brought up throughout the book that were never hit again. This probably wouldn't have bothered me as much if the ending hadn't been quite so abrupt.



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Nobody Goes to Mexico to Drink the Water, Anyway

From What I Remember... by Stacy Kramer

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

KYLIE: Tijuana WHAT? I should be putting the finishing touches on my valedictorian speech. Graduation is TODAY, and is this a wedding band on my finger.

MAX: It all started with Kylie's laptop and a truck full of stolen electronics. Okay, it was kind of hot, the way she broke us out like some chick in an action movie. But now we're stranded in Tijuana. With less than twenty-four hours before graduation. Awesome.

WILL: Saving Kylie Flores from herself is kind of a full-time occupation. Luckily, I, Will Bixby, was born for the job. And when I found out she was stuck in Mexico with dreamy Max Langston, sure, I agreed to bring their passports across the border -- but there's no reason to rush back home right away. This party is just getting started.

LILY: I just walked in on my boyfriend, Max Langston, canoodling with Kylie Flores, freak of the century. Still, I can't completely hold it against him. He NEEDS me. It's even clearer now. And I'm not giving him up without a fight.

...

This is everything you could wish for out of teen read. The perfect book to whip through at the beach or by the pool. It's witty, cunning and just crazy funny in general. Not to mention how relevant it is, any one who has been through high school can relate to this book in some way or another. It's got a rapid fire speed plot line that doesn't give you time for air, let alone to get bored with it. And each escapade is more outrageous than the last. If the description given above doesn't peak your interest enough to want to pick this book up right away, then you're reading it wrong and should try again.



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"Dedication Takes a Lifetime but Dreams Only Last for a Night"

Dreamless by Josephine Angelini

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Songs for this read: Simple Distance by The Workday Release, Falling to Pieces by Junior Doctor, Running From Lions by All Time Low, When I Go Down by Relient K

Sequels in a trilogy always tend to be the ones that mess the most with ones emotions. And never in a good way. Because of this they are given a bad name and notorious for being readers least favorite of a series. And usually with good reason. The middle book is always where the author decides to mess with everyones heart strings and keep the two favorites as far apart as possible so it seems hopeless. Or even worse, insert a love triangle. Yeah who would really want to read that? Deeeepressing. And while I must say I am guilty of holding grudges against certain middle books for these exact reasons, I think it's important to focus on the vital role a middle book plays in the overall plot arc of a trilogy.
As a middle book, Dreamless is more or less obligated to involve At least some of the story elements mentioned above. I used to believe trilogy authors did this simply to keep readers holding on to the next book to see if the lovers would get back together because they had some idea in their head that readers ultimately get bored seeing the couple happy and functional. Don't get me wrong in a sense this theory has complete credibility but this alone isn't enough.
While reading dreamless I realized just how much crucial character and plot development occur in the story line of the second book in a trilogy. While it is all being set up in the first and resolved in the last, the middle is wear you really find out who these people are. And that is why so often something huge drives the couples apart. Not purely to keep readers biting their nails but to let's them get to know the. Characters separate of each other. To get readers to love the characters as individuals that then make up a duo (hopefully) in the next installment.
Ok I really didn't set out to write all that but it just started flowing on the keyboard. Tying this back to this great book I read, dreamless does a great job establishing really just where all the game pieces lie in this plot. The mysteries of the first book are expanded and the epic battle royale has been properly introduced,
The love triangle is in full force and sides have been marked like lines in the sand. And while the second book curse succeeded in making me hurt for Helen and Lucas being so distant, you know the book is a keeper when you don't want to kill the girl when she isn't with her boyfriend. It is a rare thing these days ( at least for me) to find a book where you genuine like the heroine and don't just out up with for her boyfriend.
It's still a middle book so I'm not going to tell you I am in live with this book. But I will say I wasn't disappointed and that I just know the finale will be even better than both the first two combined.



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What is this, Middle School??

This is your typical teen girl confused, mindless rant. Last week I went to a school baseball game to see some friends on the team. Had some brief encounters with some of the other players, nothing to write home about. Next thing I know that night one of my friends texts me asking me what I think of one of the guys on the team. I barely new the guy, just met him that day. But my gut instinct was he wasn't my type which is what I told her. She of course then tells this kid that. Honestly I have Zero interest in the kid but I was like what the hell i'll make the guys night and text him. Well that was ok, boring as crud but ok. Until i get a text the next morning "mornin'". Woahhhh there buddy, no body signed up for good morning texts here. Back up that relationship train. In fact get rid of that train, you are making this way more than it needs to be. So now i must put up with the most boring, pathetic flirtation I have ever had to deal with. Well, second most pathetic, but tops to the boring. Its like middle school all over again but wayy more awkward because i thought we were all past this stage by now. Why is it so easy for me to hook the guys that im not interested in, yet so much work to get attention from the ones I want to hook??? Questions that plague the teenage mind. or at least mine. FML.

Something Out of Nothing

Callum & Harper by Fisher Amelie

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Songs for this Book: Drift Away by Move Out West, Everywhere by Michelle Branch, Only Fooling Myself by Kate Voegele,  Please Don't Go by Barcelona (duh!)

This book was equal parts charming, breathtaking, frustrating and heartbreaking. The writing its self was really lovely. The grammar, at times, left something to be desired, but it didn't distract too much from the story. Harper and Callum are intoxicating narrators. Their voices are so strong and both so witty and real. This is just one of those book that no one will ever really get until they read it themselves. I could give you a very lengthy summary of this story and let you know how it all plays out but there is some kind a poetry to the words in this story that really make you fall in love with it.

Harper and Callum are two lost souls failed by the foster system. Having turned 18 they have been kicked to the curb. One fateful day they find each other instantly feel as though they have found a missing piece of themselves. Callum takes Harper under his wing as he has been on his own a little longer than her. Each night fighting for a bed to sleep on. These two seem to have to worst luck ever, with robbery, stalkers, arson, brooding hidden love, and a knack for always getting interrupted at critical moments. But together with dear friends along the way they form a big misfit family. More family than either of them has ever had.

 I must say, the beginning is my favorite, when these two first meet there is such an innocence to their relationship, but they grow some much as characters as the book progresses over several years. Its the young innocence that pulls you in and the growth and maturity of themselves and their relationship that keeps you turning pages.
Its honestly a great read, its indie label is a bit off putting to some, as I was at first, but It will make you laugh and smile and wave your arms around in anguish, and if you're anything like me, you will love every word of it.



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The Only Thing We Have to FEAR is FEAR Itself.

Fear by Michael Grant

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Songs for this Book: Dark Horses by Switchfoot, I Will Follow You into the Dark by Death Cab for Cutie, Bullet Believer by The Bigger Lights

And just when I was starting to like her...
Wow this book was a total game changer. It felt to me like this book just breathed new life into all the characters. They ally just seemed a little... Different. And mostly in a good way. Sam seemed to finally figure out his place in this new world, while Astrid seemed to lose a part of her, yet I liked this new Astrid so much better that whiney Astrid the faithful genius. I liked badass, independent, do what she wants Astrid. Even Caine was growing on me. King Caine seemed to know his place and was almost a just ruler. I'm excited to see how his character develops even more.
Fear seemed to me to have the most character/relationship development in all if the books, and it really worked. Needless to say big things are happening In the FAYZ and it's all shaping up to be an epic showdown to the finale. Grant has rekindled my love (and utter hatred) for these kids and I can't wait to see how it all goes down.



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Belong. Long To Be.

Jellicoe Road by Melina Marchetta

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Songs for this book: Over You by Miranda Lambert, Concrete Girl by Switchfoot, Back to the Start by The Summer Set



The pages of this book are laced with sadness. An it is one of the most beautiful things I have ever read. Sometimes it makes me cry, and I can't tell if it's because I am so saddened by it or if it is just so beautiful I can't handle anymore. I can't put my finger on it but every word I read about Webb and Tate and narnie give me chills and I this feeling some where between being wonderstruck and utterly disheartened.
You know how in "Because of Winn-Dixie" they describe the candy as melancholy? This book is like that. You don't know how such a thing and elicit such an emotion but you know that it does, and something about this unknown feeling is so beautiful that you can't contain you emotions and you cry. Those candies made people cry, the irony being how can something as sweet and good as candy make a person cry? In this case the irony is how can something do basic as symbols in a page stir such strong emotions in a person?
I can't say I know the answer or that I ever will but I'm glad I know enough to ask the question because the feeling I get reading this book is something that will stay with me forever.



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In the Nano

BZRK by Michael Grant

My rating: 4 of 5 stars



All I knew about BZRK when I picked it up was that it was written by Michael Grant and it had something to do with hackers. So since I knew it was written by the infamous author of the mind blowing, revolutionary GONE novels I had an idea that whatever I was about to read would be hard-core, cringe-worthy, and make me question my morals and limits as a reader and a human being. My thinking that this was about hackers wasn't too far off. Except instead of a group of nerds somebody's basement encrypting files on a super computer these kids were hacking people's brains.
     BZRK is a group of young adults who are equipped with biots, minuscule bug like creatures that BZRK members can operate with their brains as an extension of their own body. These biots are about the size of a dust mite.
     BZRK is trying to stop the AFGC, Armstrong Fancy Gift Company, from wiring the brains of the most influential world powers on earth.The AFGC appears to be your basic major gift shop chain found in every airport and train station. But their owner(s) have bigger plans for the company. Benjamin and Charles Armstrong are twins. They never do anything with out the other. Not because they like each other as much as the fact they are conjoined twins. With three eyes, three legs but two separate people in this body, the Armstrong twins' appearances are enough to make a baby cry. They operate their own team of "hackers" using nanobots and extreme gamers to achieve their goal of world happiness.

This book has the writing we have come to know and love from Grant as well as the great character development. Although at times there we simply so many names and characters to remember it could get confusing. But while I could see the signs of Grants writing this book was completely its own. A totally original idea unique in its own ways.



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Don't Be Such a Wet Blanket

Tonight I have been thinking of some of my favorite book i read when I was younger. Of course Nancy Drew comes to mind as one I will always hold near and dear to my heart. But I believe one of the biggest factors in my early childhood life were the Narnia book series by C.S. Lewis. Now I won't get into my rant about how the new movie franchise has corrupted the stories for modern youth because that could take hours. But as I was thinking about these books a certain quote came to mind.  Favorite of the series would have to be The Horse and His Boy, that one always spoke to me. My favorite line being when Gwyn tells Aravis, "For all the dead are dead alike." But that is not the quote that has been stuck in my mind. This one is from The Silver Chair, surprisingly one of my least favorites (if thats possibly when you love them all). It is a quote from Puddleglum the Marshwiggle in defiance to the Lady of the Green Kirtle. He is defend his belief that despite her convincing lies and arguments the real world does exist. So here it is, I think it is one of the most moving and inspiring quotes in any of these books.

“One word, Ma’am,” he said, coming back from the fire; limping because of the pain. “One word. All you’ve been saying is quite right, I shouldn’t wonder. I’m a chap who always liked to know the worst and then put the best face I can on it. So I won’t deny any of what you said, even so. Suppose we have only dreamed, or made up, all those things – trees and grass and sun and moon and stars and Aslan himself. Suppose we have. Then all I can say is that, in that case, the made-up things seem a good deal more important than the real ones. Suppose this black pit of a kingdom of yours is the only world. Well, it strikes me as a pretty poor one. And that’s a funny thing, when you come to think of it. We’re just babies making up a game, if you’re right. But four babies playing a game can make a play-world that makes you real world hollow. That’s why I’m going to stand by the play-world. I’m on Aslan’s side even if there isn’t any Narnia. So, thanking you kindly for our supper, if these two gentlemen and the young lady are ready, we’re leaving your court at once and setting out in the dark to spend our lives looking for the Overland.

After the Fact

I know that the last test date was yesterday but here are a few unofficial tips for ACT testing. Maybe they can help some I'd you in April. Otherwise they are still kinda a funny read.

1) don't dress like shit. Been there done that. It doesn't help. The act of getting dressed wakes you up and gets you in the zone instead of sitting there waiting till its over so you can go back to bed.
2) If you have contacts, wear them!! It's hard to hold your head up with glasses in the way and they will end up hurting your nose.
3) jewelry has pros and cons. Don't wearing anything to dangly or that you aren't used to.
4) don't come in on a sugar/ caffeine High. You will crash. And burn terribly.
5) if you got up late and missed breakfast, don't just eat a tiny snack. You will end up even more hungry than if you had shown up on an empty stomach.
6) go potty before the test.
7) wear old, comfy, reliable underwear. Let's face it you probably aren't going to meet your next bf at the ACT, so you can leave those silky lace thongs at home. You don't want to have to stop in the middle of reading a passage to "readjust" you positioning because you just had I wear cute ones today.
8) layers. Testing rooms are not controlled variables. They can range anywhere from desert heat to sauna humidity, to Arctic chill. The best is to have short sleeves with a top layer jacket. Something to keep you warm but not too bulky where you can't work in it.

Feel free to post your unofficial tips below in the comments. 😊

Some hate mail came for you...

I wonder If he can sense the utter hatred I have toward him and his class. How very time I'm forced to look at him my hate seizes out of my eyes. How he more I have to listen the crap coming out of his mouth the closer I come to exploding and calling him on all of his BS. This class blows. I literally all feel myself tensing with hatred, and stress and my patience is wearing thin.
Lets just call him Mr. Piss. that fits nicely. Mr. Piss is creepy. He is way to "friendly" with students. He wants to know everything about everyone of his students social lives. He has no sense of personal space. He will come right up to you and sit down 3 inches away from your face. He will walk around his class room and stand right behind you, to the point where if you turn around your face would be perfectly positioned in his crotch. I feel violated and uncomfortable often. He makes inappropriate comments to students, such as "You always look beautiful, Angela" or "who wants to meet up for a little one on one research on saturday?? I'll brings snacks."
You may be imagining Mr. Piss a overly flirty, slightly perverted young 20-30 something and so this behavior isn't to revolting. Well, you would be wrong. Mr. Piss is an old man. Not so old where you cut him a break on how perverted he is because he is so very old and probably losing his marbles. But Mr. Piss is just old enough to where this behavior is at its maximum on the creepy scale. He is probably in his 60's at least. Picture this: a pink striped button up, top couple buttons left loose, khakis up to mid rib cage, white hair to grey hair and very creepy old guy glasses which he takes on and off every other second. Does he look like a nasty teacher/ sex offender in your head yet?? Well try this on for size: Mr. Piss has had atleast 2 wives. He has 2 daughters who are in their mid to late thirties, a good 15 years older than me atleast. He has 2 other daughters the oldest of which is in 9th grade. a couple years younger than me. Both sets of daughters are biologically his. Now are you grossed out??
He is a horrible teacher. He puts his own political view spin on everything he teaches. He rather freely displays his views on gay rights, political leaders, and current event issues. And if you disagree and say something about it in a project of essay your conclusion/ opinion will me counted incorrect. I get it i sound whiny, this is what school is, finding out what teachers want you to say and spitting it back at them but at some point I feel i need to draw the line. I don't believe/ agree with a word this arrogant ba-- crud face is preaching to this class. I have been swallowing all the comments I would love to spew right back at him but its more difficult everyday. I hate his teaching methods, I hate his political agenda, I hate this class, I hate Mr. Piss.
And the worst part is besides sound off in this post, I can do nothing about it. To the people in charge I have no argument. He is not technically sexually harassing students, he is teaching the curriculum, I can't switch a class because I don't like or don't agree with a teacher. Plus Mr. Piss would never agree to letting me switch because he thinks i'm just a quiet, hardworking student.
I hate this. I hate waking up and dreading school because i have to deal with this class. I hate going to this class and trying not ot roll my eyes. I hate that class ruining my mood for the rest of the day. I hate when this class is over and spend my entire free period writing blogs about how much I hate this class. I just want it to be over. Summer can't come soon enough.

In regards to my lack of upkeep...

I just wanted to comment real quick on a little point of my blog. Some might have noticed that my currently reading widget on the side of my blog hasn't been updated in pretty much forever. This is because I haven't finished reading Peculiar Children, I just really am not feeling it, so I am just quickly reading other books instead. I read them in about a night so it's not even worth putting in the 15 min to update. So I guess the point of this post was just to hope no one thinks that i haven't been updating. Not that i really even know that anyone is reading this o_O ... Anyway just wanted to cover my bases there. 

The Love Mobile

Kiss It by Erin Downing




My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Songs for this book: Walls by All Time Low, Halfway by Parachute, Settling by Sugar Land.

Official Summary:

A girl’s gotta do who a girl’s gotta do.


Chastity Bryan has never been shy about going after what she wants. And when sexy, mysterious, so-not-from-this-town Sebastian walks into Chaz’s life, she knows in an instant that what she wants next is him. Chaz has no intention of playing for keeps—but she most definitely has intentions. Who needs true love when you’ve got true lust?


Sebastian has no idea what he’s in for—but maybe neither does Chaz….


Review:
Defiantly a different kind of story.  From the description of tho book I was imagining Chaz as a manipulative little slut. Which, let's face it she kind of is. But she has her reasonings. Her character works the sulty-ness of her behavior and warps it with how relatable she is and her situations and makes her not seem like that mean girl hoe at your school you totally judges her as in the beginning.  Chaz explains it pretty well herself when she admits she is kinda similar to those girls, but the difference between the two is she doesn't care about reputation, she's just curious.
This was a quick read that draws you in. While some plot twists can be seen coming a mile away, other aspects I this story really keep you guessing.
"kiss it" keeps it simple and keeps it real. No fairy tale endings here folks but it is on hell of a story. Hopefully this book makes you look around and value what's right in front of you. Don't stress about the future, you've got your whole life to figure that out. Be the person you know in you heart that you are and don't let people's expectations or views hold you back or push you to things you don't want to do.


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